The mindset of Hags

- Zaid Hamid - An exemplary hag

Jindoun Punjabi mai day banday nain duujee beevee lay aandee, tay mai tapee hoee kehndee ay: "Zaroor oas dain nain koi jaadoo toanaa keeta hoiga!"

When a Punjabi hag's husband brought home a second wife, instead of trying to find fault with herself or seeing her husband as the wrong-doer, she immediately began to curse the new wife:

"That witch must have cast a black spell on my husband," she reasoned.


These few words highlight the mindset of many Pakistanis. One cannot even argue that it is the uneducated who revel in conspiracy theories. Browse through any forum on any site related to politics and social issues and these "hags" have seizures against the West, Zionists, and even Nestle. Ironically, most of these "hags" are based in the West and intentionally thriving off the very conditions they vehemently criticize.

Blaming the West for our problems has become a past time.

Knowledge about the intricacies of conspiracies has never really helped anyone other than massage the ego. If anything, delving in such tabloid nonsense can prevent people from spending the efforts in finding solutions to their own problems - problems that have no link nor are a result of the policies of the West.

For example, if we focus on Pakistan, what is preventing the country from achieving 100% literacy? Why has health care not been a priority? Why is most of the population still denied a clean glass of water? Why are cases of polio on the increase in Pakistan? Why does the Army absorb the largest chunk of the budget? What is preventing Pakistan from becoming an integrated nation-state even after 60 years of tumultuous existence? Why is it that throughout these 60 years, components of the states want to break away?

Even a cursory analysis will reveal that the rot has everything to do with Pakistanis themselves rather than anyone else.

For example, Baluchistan faces massive injustice from the Pakistani rulers. Chairman Khan has continuously highlighted the numbers of 300 billion rupees of gas being extracted from Baluchistan while the province's budget is only 18 billion. By some figures 15% of the federal taxes are raised from Baluchistan's resources. This approximately 15% (some figures state 17%) contribution by Baluchistan is not in dispute like the figures of Sindh's contribution by virtue of Karachi being the port of entry. Yet, despite these contributions, Baluchistan gets less than a third back from the federal pool! Whatsmore, before the money is redistributed to the provinces, around 50% of the federal money is used to pay interest, build up the Army and pay salaries. Why should the Baluch not question how the federal budget is being used for the military? What is the utility of spending so much money on the army for the Baluch? What has the Army given the Baluch? If 75% of all armed force recruits come from Punjab, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that such figures will harden the perceptions of injustice in the smaller provinces.

Natural gas from Sui, Baluchistan was discovered in the early 1960's. Rawalpindi was connected to this resource in the same decade. Quetta first began to benefit from Sui natural gas in 1995. Similarly, while the gas in Sui began to be extracted much earlier, is there any rationale to giving Baluchistan the old rate of 22 rupees per KG of gas whereas Punjab's natural gas earns it 110 rupees and Sindh 185? Point is, with such drastic numbers before us, is it any wonder why the Baluchis should seek out right independence?

And in relation to this article, do foreign powers accused of having an 'evil eye' even need to do anything more to convince the Baluch they are better off independent? Yet, unfortunately many are more concerned to project and portray foreign intervention as the cause for secessionist movements and all other major ills the nation faces. These 'conspiracy theorists' hurt Pakistan by taking away our focus from the real problems which in turn cripples the vision to find solutions.

In short: when we no longer wish to be held accountable, why expect the politicians to be held accountable? We are an educated lot and should be cognizant of distraction tactics by those who insist that the real cause of Pakistan's mess lie outside its borders.

It is fine to seek possibilities of who else is making use of the problem - but the source and the solution to the problem lies only in us. The futile obsession with conspiracies supposedly emanating from the West is detrimental to the health of society. For every one such external conspiracy, there are 100 real internal causes of instability. Time would be better spent trying to fix the myriad of internal causes rather than entering analysis-paralysis by illusions of problematic external stimuli.

A haggin' hag never helped anyone's cause. Pakistan has been kind to hags giving them ample air time and turning them into celebrities. Dr. Shahid Masood took off with his program 'End of Times' and currently TV1 is entertaining Zaid Hamid as the supremo hag whose diatribe offers no solution and no return. While television is a business and there is nothing wrong with enjoying the tantrums of these Jerry Springers/Pat Robertsons/Rush Limbaughs of Pakistan, as politically aware individuals of a country that has self-destructed, we should be seeking solutions rather than myopic explanations of these depressed individuals.